


It's All Relative

by KyraG



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Fluff, Gen, Slice of Life, minor mentions of Jake and Eridan and Feferi because reASONS OK, really really cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-13
Updated: 2015-01-13
Packaged: 2018-03-07 09:33:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3169958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KyraG/pseuds/KyraG
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I know Jane, but this is different! Instead of me telling you in all the thrilling detail that I can possibly muster, which I’ll probably do over breakfast some boring day because my goodness was it a wonder, you could just ask her yourself!”</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's All Relative

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LostOzian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostOzian/gifts).



> Ladystuck 2015 (2014?) prompt for LostOzian! I really hope you enjoy!

“Come oooooon, Jake!” You lean on the tabletop, pushing your cheeks up with your palms as you give him your best pouty expression. Your cousin, meanwhile, tilts back in his chair with a big grin spread on his face and his arms crossed and rested on his stomach. “I hope you tip over,” you mumble as he laughs and rights himself on the chair, putting all four legs back on the ground.

“Oh, you don’t mean that.” He pushes his glasses up before crossing his arms on the wooden table. He is still grinning at the look you’re giving him. Or maybe it’s because he knows he’s teasing you. Either way, it was that mischievous grin all the same.

“Maybe not, but you can’t just come back and not tell me anything!” You keep up that pouty face, talking through smooshed cheeks.

“Sure I can! And not telling you is exactly what I’m doing right now.” You are two seconds from noogie-ing that smug look right off his face. Instead you just lift your head from your hands and drum your fingers on the table. “Besides, I shouldn’t have to tell you all the joys of my adventures.”

“What, that’s what you do anyways.”

“I know Jane, but this is different! Instead of me telling you in all the thrilling detail that I can possibly muster, which I’ll probably do over breakfast some boring day because my goodness was it a wonder, you could just ask her yourself!”

“… What?” You’re pretty sure some point came out of all that rambling. But instead you just squint at him and push your own glasses up on your face, going over that awful run-on that Jake just threw at you.

Jake has negative patience, as usual; he doesn’t even let you try to respond in a better manner. “Ask her yourself! You know, invite her over to hang out? Girl time or whatever it is you and Roxy do?”

You purse your lips. “It’s called ‘just hanging out’, you know. You can keep dreaming about what we talk about.” He just grins and sticks out his tongue, familiar to the jokes.

“Yeah yeah, but that’s not the point. I could pester her, you could ask Eridan if he would mind being ferryman again?”

“Feferi told me he groused about it for hours.” You grin when you think about it, able to imagine the sulking fins and crossed arms. “I’ll see if he’d be willing to again.”

“Then I’ll get in touch with Jade.”

***

 Rose and Roxy had their bikes parked on the back porch and were playing with a deck of cards within thirty minutes of getting the news of a sleepover the next evening. Of course, that was the day after you had to negotiate with Eridan about making the eight-hour total trip out to the island and back; which you did shortly after talking with Jake. “Don’t you guys know anyone else,” he said over the video chat, “preferably someone with a plane or somethin’?” But of course he knew the answer to that. “You guys owe me,” he had said at the end of the chat while Feferi joyously hugged his head. You love watching the seadweller siblings interact.

“Jane, would you tell Roxy that she can’t tell my future with playing cards?”

Your mind is snapped back to the present. They’ve been over for an hour now, but you had waited a while to even invite them in the first place. As much as you loved the Lalondes, no way were they going to keep entertained over here for the whole eight-plus hours that it would take for Jade to make it.

“Why, will she not listen to you?” You peek your head into the dining room, where indeed Roxy has the cards laid out like she was doing a tarot reading. Rose is facing her, scowling with her arms crossed underneath her chest.

“Why should I listen? I think I can do a prediction just as good with these cards as I can with Rose’s tarot cards.”

“You can’t do predictions with my cards, Roxy.” Rose’s voice was such a sharp contrast to Roxy’s. It was quiet and restrained compared to Roxy’s loud hollering of joy. “That’s about the whole point of this conversation. If you can’t read tarot cards, you can’t read playing cards.”

“You’re just jealous because I can and you can’t.” Roxy sticks out her tongue, making Rose roll her eyes in annoyance. You walk over and bop Roxy on the head, skipping away before she can swat at you.

“I think you should let her try Rose. Maybe she’ll get something right.” Now both you and Roxy are grinning at Rose. The younger Lalonde raises her hands in defeat, turning her head to the side and closing her eyes as she sighs an exceedingly exaggerated sigh. While she’s turned away, Roxy quickly turns back around and puts a hand over a face-down card. She makes her hand tremble, and you can’t help but lean in slightly. If only for atmospheric effect, as now Rose is looking back at the two of you with an incredulous look upon her face.

“The cards, they speak to me…” Roxy says in a low, hushed tone, vibrating her hand above the card as she focuses on it intently. “Rose, dear, they speak to me about you!” She snaps her head up, and you go to look at Rose’s expression. You grin because Rose is doing her best not to. “They tell me about you, my dear little sister… they tell me!” She slaps her hand on the card, flipping it in her fingers swiftly and holding it back facing Rose. “They tell me,” she murmurs as she studies the card, and then lays it down ever so gently, “that you will break the hearts of nine men.”

“Is that the best you can give me out of a nine of hearts, Roxy?!” Rose throws her hands up in the air once again, putting her fingers through her hair. You can’t help yourself and you start laughing, not even trying to cover your mouth. Roxy laughs too, loud raucous laughter that overpowers even your own. The smaller Lalonde stands from her chair while Roxy is busy laughing, and you simply step back to let her do her work. Roxy only notices the danger befalling her when her sister is right ahead of her, and she yells in her laughter and tries to scrabble away. You have to jump back a little as Roxy completely falls over on the chair with a loud thud and Rose goes down in a hailstorm of wriggling fingers to tickle the offender. You’re still laughing and not even trying to help the laughing and screeching Roxy, despite her half-hearted pleas for your assistance. She so definitely had this coming, and now Rose is laughing too.

With all this commotion, you almost don’t hear the knocking at the door. But it rings in the very back of your ears, and you quiet just enough to see if you heard correctly. After a moment, you hear the knocking again.

“Guys, shush! Shuuuush! Our guest is finally here!” You clap your hands excitedly before crouching down and shaking both of their shoulders.

“Hey, I thought we were your guests…” Roxy murbled as she reached up and pinched Rose’s cheek, still grinning. Rose batted at her hand as she stood up, though you don’t see if Roxy retaliates further. You turn around on your heels and quickly head to the door.

“I’m coming, I’m coming!” You holler as there’s more knocking, faintly hearing shuffling behind you – musts be Rose and Roxy finishing off their scuffle as they follow you. Upon reaching the door, you stand up on your tiptoes to view out the peephole easier. You grin wide, and then get back flat on your feet as you unlatch the door and open it up.

“Leaving us outside for sooooo long, Jane!” It was Feferi that had escorted your relative, and she made haste to scoop you up into a tight hug. As soon as your feet were back on the ground you hug her back just as tight. Even though it’s warm outside, her skin is still cool to the touch as it always is.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t really close to the door,” you apologize with a grin as you pull away from the hug. When you do so, you can see another girl standing a little behind Feferi, seeming more than a little shy. She’s shorter and kind of skinnier than you and the same deep tan as you and Jake, but not as dark as the Lalondes. She’s got big glasses that remind you of what was in style half a decade ago, and…

… Is that a wolf sitting at her heels?

You’ll deal with that in a moment. “Thank you so much for bringing her here, Feferi. And be sure you pass my thanks to Eridan. Are you gonna stay?”

“As much fun as it would be, nah. Sollux and Karkat are coming over to hang out with me and Eridan, so we’re gonna have a swimming time just like you guys!” She clasps her hands together as she speaks, her jeweled earfins flicking back and forth in her excitement, making a slight jingling noise with each movement.

“Alright. Thank you again, and have fun!” You and Feferi both wave at the same time, and then she walks away with a hop in her step. Jade also waves to Feferi, but she doesn’t say anything even as she looks back at you. You don’t even get a moment to introduce herself before Roxy is right by your side, leaning over with her hands on her knees.

“Aaaawww, look at the puppy!” She makes babytalk at a dog that’s decidedly not a puppy, but you guess that’s not the point. The dog pants in response, though it looks like it’s grinning.

“Yeah, that’s Becquerel.” Jade smiles, and even though it’s just a small smile it still lights up her face. Roxy continues making babytalk noises in response, occasionally you can make out the dog’s name in her speech.

“It’s a nice name. Here, let’s do all introductions inside!” It’s been so long since you had a guest that was actually a guest and not someone just coming over to kick it on your couch you almost forget proper etiquette. You shoo Roxy back, and Rose is already standing back politely. You’re a little iffy about the massive white dog that stands when everyone starts moving around, but he looks extremely clean and calm and has the eyes of a creature with more than a little bit of intelligence. It’s a little offsetting, but you let it go.

“Thanks for inviting me over,” she says after she steps in, though she then looks to you for guidance on what to do next.

“Oh, it’s no problem at all! You’re the one that made such a long trip, after all, I’m glad to have you over.” You motion to the corner of the entryway where shoes belong, and you almost wonder if the white dog is going to snag one. But he stands there quietly; his tail in what you guess is a neutral position. You’re not that great with dogs and it probably shows.

Just ignore him, you tell yourself.

“It wasn’t so awful, though I think the seadweller was feeling it a bit more.” She gives a small chuckle while kicking off her shoes and walking a little into the hallway. You watch as the dog – you have to remember that his name is Becquerel – proceeds to move forward and sniff the Lalonde sisters. Roxy takes to him in a heartbeat, and she’s back to cooing and babytalking a dog that comes up to her midsection. With the exception of Roxy, the atmosphere is a little awkward, and both you and Rose look at each other. Do something, you can see in the other girl’s eyes.

You look back to Jade, and she’s watching Roxy and Becquerel with a small smile on her face. As if sensing she’s being looked at, she looks up at you and the Lalondes. “My name is Jade, Jade Harley. It’s nice to meet you all.”

“Oh, Jade?” Rose speaks up, and you look to her when you hear the surprise in her voice. “My name is Rose Lalonde. We talk online.”

“Oh!” Now Jade really smiles, her top teeth overtaking her lower lips. It reminds you more than a little of John and Jake, who both also have silly little overbites. You have one too, even, but it’s not as extreme as the boys’.

“And I’m Roxy Lalonde, her older sister.” You can hear the sound of fur rustling, and you look over to see Roxy crouched down to put her head to Becquerel’s head and ruffle his neck fur with both hands. The white wolf-dog-thing is wagging his tail and standing still for the attention, which is pretty cute. You guess you can allow the dog to stay inside if he’s going to be so calm like this.

“It’s nice to meet both of you,” Jade replies to them with that smile before looking back to you. You then realize that you haven’t even introduced yourself properly.

“I’m Jane Crocker, Jake’s cousin.” You pause for a moment, thinking. That thinking turns into speaking. “If he’s my cousin, and you’re his cousin… that makes us…” Now you pause because you’re completely stumped. You pinch your lips between your thumb and your first finger as you think, though you are at a loss despite this. You can hear Roxy snickering at you from where she’s petting Becquerel and you resist reacting to her.

Though then Jade also snickers, shortly after Roxy stops. It’s a small laugh that seems restrained by only shyness, but it comforts you nonetheless. “I don’t know, really. But that’s fine, a relative is a relative.” You just want to pinch this girl’s cheeks, she’s so precious.

“Though it is something along the lines of a second cousin once removed…” Rose comments quietly, behind Roxy’s cooing over Becquerel.

“Well, that doesn’t matter! Too much family-figuring for one night, I’d say.” You look back as Roxy stands, and the dog stands up with her. “Let’s go have fun! Get a few drinks, find games or something to do! No need to stand in the doorway twiddling our fingers and looking at each other awkwardly, which I know is what you are all doing. Only me and pooch here seem to be enjoying ourselves.” Indeed, Becquerel is wagging his massive tail, and all you can think in that moment is how many things he’ll knock over with it.

“You say that as if I don’t know how to entertain guests. Though I will say that you’re the only one interested in drinking so early into a sleepover.” You roll your eyes at her wide grin before walking ahead and leading everyone into the living room. It’s not as messy as it could be, and you’re glad for that. First impressions are everything, especially with regards to family. You look back to Jade, and she seems relaxed enough. Her dog is back to her side, and she has one hand on his back. “You can sit wherever you want, alright?”

“Alright, thank you.” She looks down at Becquerel, her expression unreadable to you.

“I’m gonna go get the playing cards from the other room and another deck from the cabinet, we can play BS!” Roxy is really into this, and you’re going to need to remember to thank her later. It’s been so long for you to have to entertain someone you didn’t know you had forgotten how to do so.

“What a perfect game for one to learn about their peers the moment they walk through the door…” Rose chides at Roxy’s back. “Let’s just learn about how each and every one of us lies.”

“You like that game and you know it,” you reply to Rose’s sarcasm with a grin, and she just sticks her tongue out at you. You look back over to Jade to see her sitting on the floor next to the couch, and you’re about to protest when you see that the giant of a dog is laying completely on her lap. They must do this often, you think to yourself. And she’s probably unsure if Becquerel can be on the couch. You’re not even sure yourself, but you think that the huge dog paws would tear up the furniture something fierce.

You also wonder if it’s even comfortable to have a dog that big laying on her person. She seems happy, but she also hasn’t stopped smiling. You wonder if that’s just her default face, though if it is you have truly no idea as to what it is she’s thinking about. You are usually fairly good at reading people, even those like Rose who can keep their emotions hidden well. Maybe as you get to know her you’ll be able to get a better read on her.

Rose sits in front of Jade and reaches to pat Becquerel’s head and you see her thin smile when the dog accepts her. His tail is wagging again, a dull thud-thud as it thwacks against the ground, and Rose’s caution is finally leaving her. You remember that Rose isn’t actually that fond of animals. The Lalondes have a single cat, and as far as you know that’s the only cat she’s ever liked.

You’re about to go join her in petting the white dog when Roxy returns with the cards. She has that giant grin on her face as she plops down next to her younger sister on the ground, scooting backwards a moment afterwards while motioning for Rose to do the same. Well, guess this means that the card game will be played on the floor instead of at the table. You sit down between Jade and Roxy while the sound of Rose shuffling cards hums through the air, and then you take to noticing Becquerel again. He’s watching the cards, his ears perked up and his eyes wide as he scoots off of Jade’s lap and into a sit directly next to her. Reading dogs is certainly not your forte, as it’s a body language you’re not familiar to. Though this gives you an interesting opportunity, and you take it. You look between Jade and her dog, the two of them staring at Rose. They both have the same wide eyes, the same posture. Even the way they hold their mouths shut seems identical despite the obvious difference in their skull makeup.

You’re pretty sure that, if she had moveable ears, they’d be facing forwards just like Becquerel’s. If she had a tail, it’d be wagging in that thud-thud way that Becquerel’s is.

“Do you know how to play BS, Jade?” Rose’s steady voice pulls you out of your thoughts, and you blink to reorient yourself. You realize that Rose has already started to deal cards.

“No, not really. Though! I think Bec’ wants to play.”

On your end and Roxy’s, there’s shocked silence. Rose, however, doesn’t seem to skip a beat. She deals out cards to the dog, who lightly paws them.

“Uhm, that’s great and all, but how can he play if he can’t read them?” As she speaks, Roxy brings her cards closer to herself while Rose continues to deal out the two decks worth of cards.

“Sure he can read them! I just have to hold them up for him is all.” Jade’s tone is slightly indignant, but she’s still smiling her normal smile. When you look over to Roxy, she’s more than perplexed. Rose is giving her a look, and Roxy just shrugs her shoulders.

“Alright, alright.” You zone out again as Roxy explains the rules to Jade – you know how to play, you don’t need to listen to the rules again. You and Rose make eye contact again, and you both seem to be on the same wavelength again. The atmosphere is an odd sort of tense, and you’re not sure what’s causing it. You don’t tend to be nervous around strangers and you don’t have a problem with dogs, but this specific stranger and this specific dog just make the air feel abuzz.

You never thought your fight-or-flight responses to be that sharp, since you don’t place yourself in danger very much. But out stumble words as you go to stand and you’re not entirely sure why you’re even standing and speaking in the first place.

“There’s no food made for us!” You exclaim loudly, and everyone stops to look at you. Save face Jane, you tell yourself. Keep speaking. “It’s not a good sleepover if there’s nothing made, and Jade’s probably hungry from the long trip. So I’ll get us some dinner, some treats! It’ll be great.” Roxy’s giving you a funny look and Rose looks as if she’s trying to not snicker. Jade, however, just seems mildly confused before smiling again.

“Food actually sounds really nice. Does this mean you won’t be playing, though?”

“I’ll probably wait out this game and play in the next one, if we do play again.” You smile and nod, glad that Jade at least doesn’t look upset. Again, you can’t tell what she’s actually thinking, but you let yourself think that she’s being sincere with you.

“Since I’m all done dealing out cards, we can move to the dining room table. Becquerel looks big enough to be on a chair, if he still wishes to play.” Rose is really good at backing you up, and you’re grateful. When she stands, so do you and everyone else, with Becquerel stretching as he gets up. For a moment you wonder how the dog is going to carry his cards, being a dog and all, but then you realize it’s both a moot point and a dumb inquiry. Jade picks up his cards, careful to not look at them. You wonder just how serious she is about the canine playing, but… well, she seems serious enough by how dutiful she’s being about Becquerel’s cards.

You give your hand to Rose when she sits at the head of the table, and she proceeds to dole out those cards to the others while you head into the kitchen. The way between the dining room and the kitchen is an open doorway, and as such you can hear them getting themselves settled even though you’re not fully paying attention.

The sounds of Roxy finishing explanations float over your head as you pull out bowls, measuring cups, and assorted ingredients. You’re running on autopilot as you think over what you can make quickly, not even really noticing what’s going through your mind until you get the chocolate chips out of the cabinet when you grab the vanilla.

Cookies it is.

You have the recipe memorized, so it doesn’t take much for you to get dough made up. You’re glad for the vocal nature of BS and the chatty nature of Roxy – she’s able to get any conversation started. Though as the game starts, you once again wonder about the dog. The answer comes quickly, when there’s half a bark-whine noise and thudding of what must be Becquerel’s tail. “My goodness,” you so quietly mumble to yourself, “he’s trying to say it.” You then hear Jade translate and Roxy applaud the canine for his marvelous work. You can’t help but chuckle because incredibly the dog really is playing a game where you have to lie in order to win.

“I’ll eat my whole spatula if he actually wins,” you mumble to yourself once again as you add the chocolate chips in last, and all-in-all the process takes you not even ten minutes. All the while the cycle in the other room continues.

“Five Jacks.” The voice is Rose’s, calm as ever. But in response, there’s a bark, a slight louder than the half-barks that have been sounding previously. No way. Becquerel must’ve been calling bullshit on Rose’s card announcement. There’s half a silence, then the adjacent room erupts into noise.

“Come on Rose, show your cards!”

“Bec’ said BS, you have to prove yourself!”

“He barked, for all I know he saw something in the air.”

“BARK.”

“C’mooon Rose!”

You can hear Rose rolling her eyes as there’s the rustling of cards flipping before laughter from Jade and Roxy.

“He really called you out! Take the pot, sis!”

“Can’t believe it…”

You’re grinning and trying to not laugh at Rose’s misfortune. She’s an expert at this game; rarely do you or Roxy or anyone at all ever get a chance to call her out. Yet here’s a pooch barking at her to flip her cards. Part of you is highly amused by this.

The other part is slightly terrified. But dogs are just like any other animal, right? They can sense things. And Rose must’ve just… smelled like a liar, whatever that smells like.

You scoop the dough out onto a couple sheets before shoving them into the oven. You don’t even need a timer, instead you just put the remaining dough into the fridge and go into the dining room. The tension that was in the living room is now completely gone, with Rose still scowling about her getting called out by Becquerel while Roxy and Jade grin at each other. Even the white wolf-dog-thing seems to be enjoying himself, his tail wagging back and forth as he has a single paw on the tabletop. You almost want to check to see if his claws are scratching the wood, but you stop yourself. This is a smart dog. It should be alright.

“I’m making cookies, everyone.” You smile and lean on an empty chair, crossing your arms on the top of it before resting your chest on your arms. You’re used to being on your feet a lot, so just this small amount of time isn’t bothering you.

“Oh excellent! Jade, you’re going to love Jane’s cookies. They’re the booomb!” Roxy clasps her hands together, somehow avoiding tossing her cards around.

“What kind of cookies are they?” Jade asks, giving you that curious look once again. It reminds you of those movies when rural kids first arrive in big cities and they’re completely entranced by what they see.

“Chocolate chip. Nothing too special, really.” You’re being modest, but that’s how you respond to anyone that talks about your baking.

“Oh, but they’re certainly special in every single way.”

“Don’t you drool on my cards Roxy.” All Rose gets for her troubles is another laugh from Roxy.

“Jake told me about the fact that you like to bake. It sounded really good when he described it, I had almost wished that he brought something with him.” Jade smiles happily as she glances back to her cards. “I have a lot of what I need to bake, but not a lot of raw ingredients. Like… I don’t have milk or flour, really. I have what’s in the jungle, and then if I need recipes I just look those up on the internet. I’d be so bored without internet.”

“An existence without cookies or cereal or jello…” Roxy quietly moans about Jade’s misfortunes, even though you wouldn’t exactly call them misfortunes. You’d just call it Roxy being Roxy, overdramatic and loving every moment of it.

A half-bark redirects everyone back to the game, with Jade putting down the cards that Becquerel motions to. She’s holding them up for him to see and no one else, and he motions with his paw.

“He’s calling it at two of fours,” Jade hums, smiling.

Absolutely incredible, you think as none of the others contest the call.

“But even without those things, it’s alright. I have plenty of home-grown food in my greenhouse and around the jungle, and Bec’ and I go hunting a lot for whatever else we need.” That dog could probably take down a bear as far as you’re concerned. “Though… Grandpapa did leave an old boat on the island. If I figured out how to fix that I could travel inland and get these snack foods that everyone talks about.” Jade’s smile widens at this prospect.

“You could probably ask Eridan, he knows a lot about such things,” Rose comments after calling her card, a single five.

“As if we haven’t been bothering him enough already. But we can get to that later, I can ask him. You say there’s a lot on your island, and Jake won’t tell me anything about his ‘grand adventure’.” You’re still more than a little grumpy about that fact, and you still plan on grilling him about it in the future.

“Oh, he won’t? He wouldn’t stop crying about how awesome the experience was when he left, I’m surprised he didn’t tell his favorite cousin all the cool things he saw and did while on the island.” Jade shuffles in her seat a little, getting settled as if preparing to tell a long story. “I mean, it’s all pretty normal to me. But he got to stare down a seagoat! I kinda fell asleep while he was coming ashore, but Jake and Bec’ got me back home alright. He got to see a lot of the jungle, considering he only had a small amount of time to be there before his ride got back.”

The whole game halted while Jade spoke. Talk of a seagoat, of all things, along with who-knows-what-else. You wanted to question her more, but you can smell the cookies calling to be taken out of the oven. “I’ll be right back!” You turn on your heels to fetch the cookies, still listening to the conversations behind you. Rose quickly takes over your duty as questioner, asking Jade about the fauna of the island after having her interests piqued.

“Yeah, but I kinda can’t take them seriously anymore.” You come into the conversation as Jade’s replying to something, now that your head is out of the oven. “They make this noise when they’re happy, it’s literally like if you mix a normal goat with… a whale, I don’t know. It sounds kind of like…” There’s a pause, just enough of one that you can set down the cookie trays, before Jade makes an odd stuttering bellowing noise. Roxy cracks up, and you’re finding yourself grinning too.

“It sounds realistic enough to me,” you call out to them, getting chuckles from Jade while Roxy is still laughing from the initial noise. “But come on into the kitchen, the cookies are about ready and they’re best while they’re still hot.”

“Oh sweet!” Roxy’s voice precedes the shuffling of chairs as the three humans move into the room, Jade first in line with wide eyes and a wider smile.

It wasn’t that you had your doubts about Jade. It’s just been so long since you had to get to know anyone new. But what were you even expecting? She is family, after all. Of course it was going to be alright.


End file.
